While pondering this topic, I came across this book. I so very much want the pop-up KamaSutra. It just makes me laugh - no giggle. I can see it now "Insert slot A into... tab B with a twist!" Honestly I would leave that out on the coffee table as a conversation book :)
Unlike one of the comments on last post, I vehemently disagree with the idea that we live in an over sexualized society. I feel that we live in a society that has dragged around the albatross of puritian ideals until it is dead and rotting. It is as if we are teenage boys sneaking into our parents room to steal the Playboys. There is something tittalating and secret about it all at the same time. This idea has done nothing but damage. Hidding healthy sexuality is not good for us. Teaching us that sex and by extension our bodies are somehow dirty and to be ashamed of, is not healthy. Teaching us to reject parts of ourselves wholesale starts us down some very schizophrenic roads.
So here is my part of bring back healthy sex :)
I have been pondering where to begin and realized that this topic is more than just a two paragraph post. So this series will go until I am finish and I will see where this one leads me :)
I promised techniques and so as such I should back up and explain my background and then hopefully the techinques will make a little more sense. I am not a tantric master. I am not even Buddihst. So this will not be about revealing the great secrets of the universe ( honestly I don't think that there are any left...). It is just my opinion and experience. Take from it what helps you and leave the rest. Trust me you will not offend me in the least :)
OK the brief background... my extended family is huge and very diverse folks. I went to Catholic school, but my favorite uncle was a practicing sex magickian. This topic did not get broached until I was almost 30. It was not until after my Saturn return that I realized that his music studio was also his temple. As a kid I loved to sleep in their studio. Funny as an adult I used to love to sleep in my mentors temples.
I blame my TM aunt who would meditate to put all of us kids to sleep. It worked like a charm and has taken years to undo. We were however all very peacefully sleepy kids :)
I was cruising along nicely in my life until my Saturn return came and smacked me upside my head. Literally, it was just devastating. In the midst of all of that, I found my first mentor. I jokingly explained that if I was going to be a magickian it would be a sex magickian. At that point he shoved a copy of Enochian Sex magick in my hand. To this day only about 10 pages have ever been read. To me it STILL reads like stereo instructions. It did serve to slow my ass down. Unfortunately he also shoved Practical Sigil Magick by Frater UD into my hands. That on the other hand was pouring gasoline on a smoldering fire.
About the same time I got ahold of DMK Modern Sex Magick. I read a few chapters, skipped ahead and interpolated the rest. The explosions were glorious. Eventually Practical Sigil Magick was demanded back by my mentor for my own good. I often thank him for that :) He is not and has never been under any obligations (fraternal or otherwise) to be my mentor and was just hell of a nice guy about it. Sometime after all of this I finally found my other mentors in the OTO and the process fell into a much more orderly pace.
The problem early on was not my lack of dedication or fear. It was my lack of directing the energies appropriately. Once I figured out that I could raise them, I did so AT LEAST daily and I didn't actually DO anything with them. Also, I read the part about banish by laughter and didn't bother with the LBRPs. So basically I had a big spiffy cloud of whirling sexual goo all around me. My mentor at the time was trying to herd a bunch of youngish magickians (think cats) and I was my own little storm. He eventually stepped in and taught me how to banish, whether I liked it or not :) He also then suggested that I direct the energy somewhere... anywhere... just not the swirling cloud. It was starting to slide over into all sort of other things and just becoming a big funky distraction.
When I finally did decided to do something with it, the process was not well thought out and the statement of intent was sloppy at best. The results were life lessons/object lessons at their finest. So from my glorious explosions I have learned a few things via trial and error. The trial is necessary - the error is not. I am not going to say that everything has been sunshine and roses, but it has been entertaining.
So to those about to embark on this path I say go boldly into the land of "know thyself." I say this on all levels and not as a smart ass remark. The first steps into sex magick needs to be a great deal of knowing yourself inside and out :) The first steps at this should probably be by yourself. Mixing more than one energy before you have it balanced is just begging for explosions.
When I was younger, I realized that I was carrying around baggage from my Catholic upbring. Honestly, I had it in my head that as long as I did not enjoy sex it was not a sin. I do not know how that got there, but I assure you that I dragged it dutifully along into my 20's. It has LONG since been purged.
The in the first few steps you need to be looking at what social morays you personally hold towards sex. If you are ashamed of sex or not fully embracing yourself, there are bound to be wobbles in your process. Sometimes the wobbles are part of the process, but sometimes they are just unnecessary distractions. Find out what you personally like sexually. Find out what turns you on in an unabashed way. No holds barred sort of way. Revel in it. Embrace it and yourself. Then explore yourself. If you do not know what you like sexually and how to make yourself orgasm then this process will be exponentially more challenging. Just like any magickal work, practice is the key.
The good Frater is in need of the computer so Part III will continue on preliminary techniques.