Moons ago I took the name Gimel as part of my magickal practice. In part, because my mentor had a Hebrew letter name and I thought that was just how it was done. The other part is more subtle and complex - but then again isn't everything?
Gimel relates not only to the moon ( a good thing for this Pisces) and the High Priestess tarot card but also to the camel.
"Why is the camel in there???" I had to ask myself.
While your milage may vary, it has started to make sense to me these last few months in the desert. The card is placed on the Tree of Life between the spheres of Tipereth ( 6 the Sun) and Kether (1 the Prime Mover). The camel is the only creature that can cross the desert of the abyss from the material world into the preformative world. While I have no intentions of "Crossing the Abyss" in the CM sense of the term, I think that all magickians do it in some form as part of the daily Work. I think that this is especially true for practicing sex magickians. Least I digress...
This weekend I will take Willful and concious steps to becoming a Priestess of the Gnostic Mass. It is something that I have been putting off for a VERY VERY long time. For a very long time, I had used the excuse that I was really too far away from any one to train with and besides you really need a Priest for that. The truth of the matter was that I had not found a Priest that I was willing to work with. I am picky, very very picky about who I let touch me. While the Gnostic Mass is symbolic of sex there are parts that are very intimate energetically and physically. I knew that I would not be performing my part of the Mysteries if I was up on the altar thinking "Dude, if you touch me I swear I will deck you." The God forms involved would kick MY lily white ass.
Then I move to the desert. (Insert mental image of a camel walking across the burning sands of a desert to a cool oasis...)
The desert here is literally filled with people to train with. My magickal partner is now a Priest and so I am flat out of inertia excuses. When I started to realize that I was out of excuses, I started finding new ones.
"The tools are expensive and I am poor" was the first one to pop up.
Then a dear sister (out of the blue) upgraded and gave me her older but still amazingly wonderful tools. Damn, this means I have to get off my ass and Work. I hate it when the universe kicks your ass into gear.
So before the universe gets a bigger hammer, I will get off my ass and just do it. I will try not to get mired in the costuming side of the ritual. I am sure that will be my next excuse...