I don't like being scared. It is not that I don't get scared, but it is not easy to do and it generally pisses me off afterwards. That pretty much sums up my last experience skrying XCAI. This time I went in ready for battle. I don't think it was my conscious intent, but a least subconsciously I had girded my loins :)
A few nights ago I had a weird dream about the good Frater giving me a copy of his ring and trying it around my neck with a red string. This was after a dream where like Shiva I was killing an attacking tiger by sending into the abyss. In one dream I got the number 760. The Enochians know that I am a researcher by nature and numbers are going to get looked up. When you look up 760 in 777 you get " "Both active and passive"; said in the Qabalah concerning the Sephiroth, confinement - detention, Yesod, 42-fold Name in Yetzirah. The dream with the string had me searching for my math classes in rooms 155 and 255. 155 yields many things amoungst them Adonai the King and Angel of 2nd Dec of Capricorn. 255 yields many things amoungst them the night demon of 3rd Dec of Sag and burdensome; with difficulty.
So in my little universe, I took it as getting ahold of one of the Cacodaemons of Sag during the void of course of the moon. I suspect that the names are very similar for both the cacodaemons and the angels. It turns out tonight we were working in Capricorn. Woot!
The opening was very intense. While I do not think that the good Frater intended to be protective, it is his Leo nature. He banished the hell out of the place, literally. During the opening I kept getting an odd form of the pentagrams popping up. They were really loud.
As we started skrying I grabbed the tablet across the table and the lamen. I called to and vibrated XCAI. I got a response. I asked if it was indeed XCAI and I got a very androgenous set of voices. They stated that they were indeed XCAI. They felt right. I vibrated one more time for good measure and the signal got stronger. I asked for a visual of their form but was ignored. Or I got something that I did not understand. I started to get white and blue lightening bolts with arrows. It was like a river but into a void. It existed in space but not in physical space. I asked for a smell and got ozone. I asked for a sound and got crackling electricity. I was starting to see the pattern. I asked what it would feel like and it downloaded enough energy through my third eye that I may not sleep for a week. I am literally wide awake and full of energy still. It was, however, a very pleasant sensation. It was close to how the energy moves in sex magick. I asked if they were about sex and they stated that while they were that was their lowest form and the one least like them. They then explained that I didn't understand this kind of sex, my kind of sex was too emotional for what they were talking about. I got the rather crude phrase, "think Gorilla fuck." With that they succeeded in changing the subject.
I asked for wisdom and they laughed. I got that I needed to understand the proper application of force. Specifically I needed to bury my fire in the Earth otherwise my watery nature just turns to steam. That one meant more on an internal level than is apparent here. At one point I commented that I was getting a really firy form and the stated matter of factly, your hand is still on your wand - move it. As I moved my arm off of my wand the vision cleared. Ooops.
Finally I got up the ovum to ask if what I got last time was of them. They said it is not of us, it was a problem. I asked what it was and just got that loop repeated. Moving along I got a visual of an event horizon where two planets would come together and the space between them formed a type of gravitational energy. It was spectacular.
I asked at one point if they were female, since that was how they sounded. They stated no. I asked if they were male and again they stated no. To save me the time of pondering a third question, they stated we are beyond gender in ways you do not understand.
I kept pressing for a visual and kept getting flowing electricity and the logos moving down through creation. They were some point of manifestation. In fact that is what I got a lot of were points. Little blue points. Then I got a series of arrows and triangles. At that point they sort of faded. I opened my eyes and was curious about the mirror. Last time I tried it the process was not functional. This time I got my nose right on the glass and stared deeply. It faded into a series of blue and green dots. It was like an energy amoeba as I again asked for a visual I got "my you are persistent." and they downloaded a whole ton of energy again. At that point I moved the mirror to see a rather shocked Frater staring back at me.
This was a much more functional skrying session and I am very glad to have moved past this.
I Am Still Here
10 months ago