Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Incoming

There is seriously something crossed up in my Mars. At some point I will have to work on untangling it.

My one real day off yesterday was spent violently ill and just trying not to cry myself to sleep. It was not pleasant and my body has announced that the last 30 days did not go unnoticed. Damn.

So when I got into work today, I literally felt like death warmed over and then all hell broke loose.

When I was 19 I spent time in Yugoslavia during the war. The better part of 20 years later, I still go back to it anytime the boys at work get the munitions a bit too close. It is an occupational hazard.

Most of the time I try not to let it phase me and I go on about my business trying to keep a calm exterior. The interior is a whole other matter. Today was distinctly different. At least 30 times today the munitions were close enough to rattle the building and set off all the alarms. As long as the rest of the staff were around, I could sort of remind myself that they are not REALLY shelling me. Then for the last two hours it was just me.

I went outside to "check the plant", but in reality I just didn't want to be in that building anymore. For whatever reason, being shelled in a building was distinctly too close to home. The building in Yugoslavia were not the most sturdy and you were often better out in the open than taking cover in something that was likely to come down and kill you. I learned to fear the shaking and the after shocks. 20 years later it all comes flooding back. The mind is indeed an amazing thing.

It is unfortunate that I cannot drink. Today I would really like to just get good and blitzed. Then again like so many things in this magickal path, that which you cannot go around you must go through.

So here is to surviving and the sincere hope that one day the shelling will not bother me.

9 comments:

葉雅慧 said...

快樂與人生,是最好的伴侶..............................

StarCherub said...

It must be in my Mars too, because I was down all day and still today, same time, with weepiness. Will RSS you for updates, good blog.

word verification is: pagam

佩昭彥怡 said...

勤勉是幸運的右手,節儉是幸運的左手。......................................................

YoungW21087 said...

與其爭取不可能得到的東西,不如善自珍惜運用自己所擁有的........................................

逸凡逸凡 said...

thank you for you to make me learn more,thank you∩0∩

長卉LisetteC said...

非常感謝~3Q~....................................................

李0825juanherzberg said...

快樂是你與生俱來的權力,它不應該取決於你完成什麼。 ..................................................

韋于倫成 said...

人逢順境不逞強,身處逆境不示弱。........................................

韋于倫成 said...

享受你自己的生活,不要與他人相比。 ..................................................